CHANG MAKES IT BETTER
“Well, Mr. Chang, it’s very a embarrassing problem. We hope you can help.”
“If embarrassed, must be about sex.”
“It’s something we’ve been hiding for a long time.”
“Chang find ‘Hiding for long time’, make problem worse.”
Category: A Mr. Chang Story
Mr. Chang Tries Comedy
“I practice stand up comedy for Chinese restaurant. You have fried rice? Give ’em black coffee. That sober em up.”
“I have a serious problem.”
Make Real
“That’s only in the movies,” said Number One Son. “We are from the books. We were next to each other on a shelf in Cincinnati. We got out because of cracked spines.”
“For cracked spine see chiropractor. Not Chang.”
Do It
A week later, a tearful, Mrs. Smith returned. “Oh, Mr. Chang. It’s terrible. He’s after me all the time. I don’t get any rest. I cant get any house work done. It’s sex, sex, sex, sex, every minute. And he wants me to do the most disgusting things. What am I to do?”
Get A Girl
“I want a girl.”
“That cost more than bedroom set. You got credit card?”
Mr. Chang
“I’m Lt. Noonan, of the LAPD Bunko Squad. I’d like to ask you some questions.”
“Don’t own Bunco. Have Sony Flat screen. Good price. Very happy.”
Strong
“What about, how Arnold Schwarzenegger looked, when he won Mr. Universe? The women were all over him. That’s what I’d like.”
“What limit on credit card? Maybe, not enough.”
Roger
“If you’re Mr. Chang, you’ve got to help me. I need your advice”.
“Bad advice, free. Good advice cost money. What kind advice you want?”
Rock-a-Bye Baby
“We want to have a baby.”
“Wrong place to make baby. Try regular method. I can make you Saint Bernard dog.”
Dream Lover
“I want someone to love.”
“OK. I make you Saint Bernard. You love it.”